


If you saw the real me, What would you feel?

by StephCaroline



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Bullying, Crossdressing, Depression, Hurt/Comfort, Misunderstandings, Multi, Pack Mom, Protective Derek, Rape, Rape Aftermath, Self-Harm, Stiles is Pushed Out of the Pack
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-09
Updated: 2016-03-25
Packaged: 2018-04-30 20:18:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5178284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StephCaroline/pseuds/StephCaroline
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone has their secrets, Stiles is no diffrent. He terrified someone will find out, terrified everyone will leave him, disgusted by him, but most of all he's terrified they will take it from him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is another try at writing teen wolf fanfition, it's dark so read the tags and if your trigered by any of it don't read!
> 
> Also I would sove for someone to Beta this work, english is not my first leguage so forgive me for any mistake, if you're intereted leave a comment.
> 
> Feed back is always good just don't be mean

Claudia Stilinski was a woman who was beautiful inside and out, she was always sweet looking and never wore pants, maybe three or four times Stiles remembered his mother using them but other than that she always wore beautiful dresses, she didn’t have a favorite color because she said life was made of colors and every one of them was beautiful. She had long brown hair and soft whiskey colored eyes, upturned nose and pouty lips she used often to convince her husband of anything, as if John Stilinski could ever say no to her.  She loved to dance, she loved to cook, she loved to help other people but what she loved the most was her son.

Once she got pregnant Claudia just started to glow. And sometimes when she was alone she would put both hands on her belly and wished it was a girl. She longed for someone to share everything she knew, a little girl with her hair and John’s eyes. Because no matter what parents tell you about just wanting the baby to be healthy, and maybe that’s true, but it’s also true that everyone has fantasies, every parent imagine how their child it’s going to be like, and Claudia wanted a little girl.

When Stiles was born Claudia wasn’t disappointed because it wasn’t her fantasy girl but it was her very real boy.

 

* * *

It started when Claudia got sick and her hands started to shake so much she couldn’t do her make up any more. Stiles was nine years old and every time he saw his mom struggle with a pencil or a brush his little heart broke a little more.

So one day he approached his mom and asked her to teach him how to do her makeup. Claudia smiled, hugged her boy and did just that. The first time wasn’t perfect, neither was the second but by the time Claudia couldn’t even held a brush Stiles could do her make up with his eyes closed. 

Stiles was ten when his mother died. And all he remembers of the day when they buried her was how her makeup was all wrong.

* * *

After that he remembers crying and fighting with his dad. He remembers lovingly folding his mom’s dresses for goodwill, and feeling sick to his stomach thinking that a stranger was going to wear something his mom wasn’t going to be able to wear anymore. What his father didn’t realize was that there was a box missing and that it was hiding in his son’s closet.

For three years Stiles just took it out on his mom’s birthdays, never on the anniversaries of her death, because Claudia Stilinski wore what was in the box while she was living, not while she was dying.

* * *

When Stiles was thirteen he saw something it made him stop in his tracks, a little thrift shop hiding between two big clothing stores. It was hard to notice the little shop but that day they had a beautiful yellow sundress on display. He didn’t realize he was walking towards the store until he was already inside.     

The first thing he thought was that his mom would have loved everything inside that store.

“How can I help you?” The male voice startled him making him flail his arms almost knocking the mannequin holding the dress down.

“I’m sorry” he said feeling his cheeks heat up. The man behind him chuckled and when he finally turned around he was taken aback by how pretty the other male was. His body slim and face too soft. “…um, Hi” He gave a little wave.

“Hi,” the man’s smile widened “do you like the dress?” The man asked looking at the yellow dress.

“It’ very pretty” Stiles said again looking at it with a faraway look. “I knew someone who would have loved it.”

The other mind sighed.

“Me too” the he smiled. “What’s your name?”

“Um, Stiles” the other man looked at him in surprise “it’s a nickname, my real name it’s too hard to pronounce.”

“It’s not that” the man cleared his throat “I’m Byron, I knew your mother, we were best friends since high school.” Stiles was left stunned for several second looking at the man in front of him “Would you like some tea?” Stiles couldn’t nod fast enough.

He spent the rest of the day with Byron, hearing stories about his mom in high school trying to match the wild free spirited girl with the elegant woman he knew all his life. It wasn’t as hard as he thought it would be. He learned that Byron knew him when he was a baby but couldn’t be there for his mom because he had spent the last decade living in London. By the time he had heard about Claudia’s sickness she was already gone. He had almost hopped on a plane to return to Beacon Hills. When stiles asked him why he didn’t Byron smiled sadly, eyes seeing something that wasn’t there.

“I remembered your mother saying goodbye to me at the airport” he sighed “don’t you dare come back here until you find what you’re looking for, whatever it is, no matter how long it takes” they both stayed silent for several minutes before Byron could continue. “I didn’t even know what was I looking for, I found it and I didn’t realize I had until just six months ago. I simply woke up and everything became unbelievably clear” he chuckled “I just started laughing and crying and I swear I felt Claudia all the way here when I decided to come back.” 

He didn’t say what he had found and Stiles didn’t ask.

By the end of the day just before saying goodbye Byron took the dress lovingly, wrapped it up carefully and gave it to stiles without a word.

After that day Stiles visited Byron at least once a week and spent the whole day with him and sometimes Byron wrapped a dress Stiles had been eyeing and gave it to him. He always got home and took out the box putting the dresses there with a little smile.

He was fourteen when he saw the long, wavy, brown wig, a perfect match for his own hair. It was the first time he asked something from Byron. He asked for a job.

Byron didn’t eve bate an eyelash.

It was almost his mom’s birthday when he could buy the wig.

He told Byron that that year he was going to do something special and if he could spend the day with him outside the shop. Byron just asked when and where he wanted to meet.

* * *

It was his mother’s birthday and he took out the box and with his mom’s old makeup and he used it on his face for the first time with a slight tremor in his hands. The wig came next and finally the yellow dress Byron first gave him. With his heart beating fast he looked at himself on the big mirror of his bathroom.

It was the day something clicked in his head.

The day he realized why he was so awkward and his arms were always flailing, because for the first time he was comfortable in his own skin and was calm and clearheaded without his medication. It was the day he found himself.

The first time he realized he liked what he saw on the mirror when he didn’t even know he didn’t liked himself before.

And he cried.

He cried because he was relieved.

He cried because he felt happy.

He cried because he felt sad.

He cried because he finally saw how much he looked like his mom.

And he cried even more because he couldn’t share this big moment in his life with her.  

Then he dried his tears, fixed his makeup, put on his shoes, and went to his favorite ice cream parlor, the one he used to go before with his mom, smiling at the girl taking orders. No one seemed to recognize him and that made him giddy and happy.

The only person who did was Byron, and judging by the smile and the tears he wasn’t bothered or surprised. He just hugged him and told him he looked beautiful.

Stiles believed him.

After that Byron took him to a place he loved to go to dance with Claudia when they were young. He was surprised it was still open but he was not surprised that all they played were songs by Frank Sinatra, Louis Armstrong, Ella Fitzgerald, Quincy Jones and the likes.

That day he learned how to dance too.

Because on her mother’s birthday he didn’t go to the cemetery where his mother was resting, he didn’t curled up on a ball and cried himself to sleep. On her mother’s birthday he lived the way she couldn’t anymore. 

* * *

He kept it a secret from everyone except Byron. Because he knew even if he felt more like himself dressed as a girl that as a boy he still lived in a small town, he still was bullied for being the smart ADHD kid at school, he didn’t think adding cross dressed would help much.

He also knew Scott wouldn’t understand and the thought of losing his only friend made him want to throw up.

And his Dad, God his Dad, he didn’t know how to tell him, or how he would react, he remembers how his Dad could barely look at him for a year after his Mom died because of how much he looked like her. How would he manage when stiles dressed as a girl was the spitting image of Claudia?

So he kept it a secret. And when he knew he would be alone all day with Scott grounded and his father’s double shifts he put on makeup, a pretty dress with shoes and his wig before calling Byron who took him dancing no matter the day.

* * *

When Scott became a werewolf he thought he was going to discover his secret with his new super senses, call him out on his lies the days he wanted to go dancing an made up excuses, that he would smell the traces of perfume on him. But Scott never noticed, and with Allison always there it didn’t surprised stiles, it hurt becoming invisible to the only friend he had but it didn’t surprised him.

Then there was Derek Hale, the guy that made him nervous, terrified, angry, aroused, and shy all at the same time. The guy who made him realize he wasn’t in love with Lydia but with the image of her, one he wanted for himself. Derek made him realize what really was to want someone, with all the emotions that came with it.

Stiles knew what suffering was when the fantasies began. Fantasies of his real self in dates with Derek Hale dancing to Frank Sinatra made him blush in the middle of a class or when Derek himself caught him with that stupid smile on his lips making him blush even harder.

He thought nothing could be worse.

Then the wet dreams started. He avoided Derek for days after each one. He even locked his bedroom window knowing the werewolf would show up unannounced as always and smell Stiles’ come and the lube that coated his bed.

Then shit after shit started to happen in beacon hills and he couldn’t avoid Derek after each dream anymore because it was like the wolf was a constant presence on Stiles room, which didn’t help the matter at all.  But stiles could manage all of it. The supernatural world becoming something real, the werewolves, hunters, kanimas, banshees, even his own magic, his oblivious friend and even his unrequired love for the emotionally stunned werewolf.

What was killing him was not having time to be himself, to dress up and go dancing. He had never spent so much time without it since that first time and it was sending him into a spiral of depression like nothing of the horrors he had faced had done it.

But he stood strong for his pack, because it was his pack now, and the only thing keeping him together. Isaac needed all the love he could get, Erica needed someone with who she could be the kind and soft person she was inside, Boyd needed someone to bring him out of his shell, Lydia needed someone to value and understand her brilliance to remind her to drop the Ice Queen act, Jackson needed someone to take him down a peg or two, Scott needed a shoulder to cry about Allison not wanting him and Derek needed someone to stand up to and for him, someone to remind him to slow down, to reassure him his pack was safe, to smile more, to live.

And the one doing it all was stiles.

He knew he could do it all; he really did because for him every one of those things came as natural as breathing. The problem was that he couldn’t breathe in his own skin.

* * *

Then he sprained his ankle.

He was acting as bait, without the approval of anyone, running from a horde of hungry fairies that wanted to feed of his magic when his foot caught on a root and white hot pain made him scream before hitting the ground bruising his ribs, even then all he could think was that everyone was going to be pissed at him. He heard the howls from the wolves answering his cry and even facing the fairies by himself he felt safe while warmth bloomed in his chest.

The last thing he saw before losing consciousness were a pair on red glowing eyes. 

And yes, they looked pissed.

* * *

“What the fuck were you thinking?!”it was the morning after, apparently while fairies chased after him some of them managed to get close enough to feed, draining him and knocking him out for twelve hours straight.

Derek was not happy.

“Calm down, Sourwolf” stiles said rolling his eyes “nothing major happened, it could have been worse” it was the wrong thing to say apparently.

“Nothing maj- are you serious?!” Derek flashed his eyes and stiles felt the now familiar mixture of fear and arousal running through him, thank god Derek was too pissed to notice. “Of course it could have been worse, Stiles, no one knew you were there, you tried to fight them alone!” Derek kept pacing in front of him raising his voice more and more.

“You didn’t let me join you!” Now stiles was pissed.

“And why do you think I didn’t?” Derek asked, nose flaring “they were after you! You are supposed to be the smart one!” Derek was looming over him making him feel little, Stiles hated it, even if his face didn’t revealed the hurt his anger was hiding “You may have magic in you but you don’t know how to use it yet, you’re human, a very breakable human and you don’t seem to get it or care. You went there alone; you were irresponsible, put yourself in danger and went behind all of our backs.” the werewolf reign himself taking deep breaths before speaking again eerily calm “That’s not how pack works; I hope you get it soon.”

And just like that Derek disappeared through the window leaving stiles alone in his bedroom drowning in anger and guilt, feeling miserable for the rest of the night.

The only good thing was that it was Saturday and his spark would heal his ankle by Monday morning.

* * *

That Monday he didn’t want to face the betrayed looks on the pack’s eyes so he avoided them and they in turn avoided him. Even if he didn’t want to see them it hurt to know that they didn’t want to see him either.

It was the start of hell.

Stiles was a firm believer of ignoring your problem until they went away, so he decided to keep avoiding the pack until they weren’t mad and believing soon everything would just returned to normal without having to do anything. Apparently it wasn’t a good plan because the hurt looks didn’t go away, because every day they were worse and soon anger replaced the hurt. It wasn’t long before stiles reached the conclusion it was too late.

He wasn’t pack anymore.

* * *

A month later he needed his dresses like he needed to breathe, he had lost weight and couldn’t sleep at night thinking about how the pack could be in danger every night and he didn’t know anything, couldn’t help them.

Then a voice mocked him in the dark of his bedroom that he wasn’t pack and even when he was he couldn’t help them anyway.

His depression spiraled out of control.

The next day he called Byron and went dancing.

It was like breathing fresh air, and for just a few hours he felt calm.

He met a girl with long black hair, black dress and awesome marvel leggings. Her name was Kira and she realized he was a boy the exact same moment he recognized her from the shop. He remembered her asking for the same dress she was wearing and asking if leggings would ruin the look. He remembers laughing and shaking his head. She was sweet and had talked with him about Marvel and Star Wars. He had loved her immediately.

Stiles panicked for five seconds before Kira had smiled and telling him how pretty his dress was. The rest of the night was spent with Byron taking one dancing while the other rested, he joked about the good cardio they were making him do.

Close to midnight they said goodbye to Kira, he kept dancing.

He could smile easier but not fully because even dancing with stars and the full moon above his head, surrounded by other dancing bodies he felt alone again, knowing that in that moment Isaac and Allison were probably sparring and flirting chocking everyone with their UST, Scott was probably looking like someone kicked his puppy while Lydia rolled her eyes at him from her seat in Jackson’s lap even thou they weren’t a couple anymore, Erica was most likely changing channels on the TV looking at Boyd every once in a while searching for any kind of reaction.

And Derek was surely acting like he was asking himself again why he chose to make a pack out of teenagers that were drowning him in teen angst and drama. Like he didn’t secretly watched them with a barely-there-smile looking content and happy knowing all his pack was under his roof where he could keep them safe, bathing in the familiar scents of pack.

And if Stiles were there he knew he would be in the kitchen baking his full moon cookies, shooing the wolves when they went to the kitchen looking to dip their paws in the cookie dough. He could see it so clearly that he choked mid step while dancing filling a panic attack approaching quickly.

Byron knew something was up, recognizing the signs he took stiles to the alleyway behind the building and held stiles while trying to bring him down from his panic attack.

“Como on, Stiles” Byron pleaded “breath with me, in and out, in and out” he directed him “like that, good, keep going just like that, keep breathing” fifteen minutes later stiles finally could breathe on his own. Even if he had started to cry silently, his body exhausted. He notice his wig had fell off and that only made him cry harder, sobbing quietly while picking the wig up putting it back.

“Take me home” was all he could say and Byron picked him up with a sad smile noticing again how light the boy was, how he could feel his ribs through the fabric of the dress. Byron looked at the sky for a moment and not for the first time he wished Claudia was there.

Neither one of them noticed a quickly retreating form.

* * *

The next day he knew in his bones something was going to happen, something bad.

All day he spent looking over his shoulder, looking for something, not knowing what but the feeling of dread making him jitterier with every minute it passed. Sometimes he swore someone was watching him but he never caught anyone even looking in his direction. By the time it was time to go home stiles was sure he was losing his mind.

It tells you something about your state of mind when you feel someone slamming you against a wall and you are relieved that something was finally happening.

Then a more healthy emotion took over.

Because his aggressor wasn’t a brooding, six-foot werewolf in a leather jacket. And the guy wasn’t alone.

“Look here at the little freak,” the guy holding him said “you almost look normal” everyone chuckled, Stiles was confused.

“Let go” he said trying to fight the Ken wannabe. He was slammed harder against the wall.

“Or what?” He mocked “you’re going to call for your friends?” The guy sighed “do they know?”

“What?” Stiles choked trying to breathe

“That you like wearing dresses?” Stiles gasped felling the blood in his veins freeze, suddenly everything was cold. He started to shake “and fucking older men apparently” the guy continued to taunt, in front of him appeared a cell phone, a picture of him from the night before.

It was him in a blue short sleeved dress, his wig on his hand and just enough light to make his face recognizable, shining tear tracks on his cheeks. If it wasn’t because the photo was being used to hurt him he would way it was beautiful, he looked almost ethereal.  Then there was a photo of him in Byron’s arms walking toward his car.

“Freaks like you shouldn’t exist, even if they look good in a skirt” the guy hissed before punching him right on the kidneys making silent tears slid from his eyes “you tell anyone about this and I’ll show you what a real man is just before covering the entire building with this photo. What would the sheriff say looking at his son dressed like that? I doubt he would get reelected with a son like you and everyone knowing the kind of freak you are.”

“Ple…please” stiles sobbed and hated himself for it “I’ll do… do anything.”

“Anything?” the hot breath on his ear made him shiver, not liking at all the tone of voice the guy used, the feeling of dread only got worse when the guy told his friends to go. When they finally disappeared, Stiles felt the hot breath on his ear again “let see if you can suck a cock like the bitch you try to be” Stiles felt like throwing up.

That’s how his mouth was used for the first time, while he chocked sobs and tears ran down his face, while his throat was fucked raw trying to keep still feeling himself shutting off, retreating to his own mind, felling the hot seed being spill down his throat and spilling from the corners of his mouth.    

There was not rough but gentle finger on his hair, no sweet words spilling from plump lips before being bitten by adorable bunny teeth, no smell of woods and leather. No Derek. 

When he was finally alone he did throw up.

Once, there on the grass of the back of the school, and again when he got home barely reaching the toilet.

It was Friday.

He didn’t sleep or ate the entire weekend.

It happened again.

* * *

Two weeks later he harmed himself for the first time.

He panicked because he couldn’t feel anything. The pack had been missing from the last three days, and if that wasn’t enough to make him worried sick knowing there was probably a threat they were facing or recovering from, Taylor, his constant abuser, felt like that gave him a free pass to use him as he pleased as many times as he wanted, always so cautious to never approach Stiles when any of the pack were near.

After the last time Taylor used his mouth that day he got home and noticed the numbness. How his eyes lacked life, how he couldn’t feel his sore jaw or the burning in his stomach telling him to eat something; how he saw a stain on his shirt he knew was semen and didn’t want to throw up.

He panicked, eyes flying everywhere searching, not knowing what until the cutter caught his eye on his desk.

Stiles took off his clothes that smelled like Taylor and took the cutter to the bathroom and into the shower. He didn’t feel the first cut on his thigh.

There was another, and another, until finally on the fifth one he felt it. The numbness falling away through the open wounds, blood coating his thighs, he felt it all.

The pain

The sadness

The anger

The nausea

The helplessness

And he almost sobbed out on relief when he finally threw up.

Sometime later he threw out the cutter felling horrified for doing what he did, damaging his own body, the weight of his acts settling while he cleaned the cut wrapping them in gauze.

That night he fell asleep asking for forgiveness. 

* * *

It wasn’t until two week after that he finally found clarity.

It was his mom’s birthday, and that night was a night of full moon.

He noticed when without being conscious of his movement he found himself in front of the box, automatically running his fingers through the fabric of the dresses that he noticed the calendar on his wall.

It was like a sign, he needed his mom and he needed his pack.

He needed them because he was afraid of what would he do, catching himself looking at sharp objects with too much interest.

He would beg them if he needed to. Because they were worth it and he missed them everyday more and more. Because if everything went according to the plan he was formulating he would need them even more. He took his cell phone out and smiled a little for the first time in forever.

 

**To: Sourwolf**

**_Please meet me after school._ **

 

He didn’t wait very long for the reply and that made his smile grew.

 

**From: Sourwolf**

**_I’ll be there_ **

* * *

Like clockwork Taylor took him to an empty classroom before the bell rang signaling the end of the day.

“Get to work” Taylor said already pulling down his zipper.

“No” Stiles took a step back, voice wavering but eyes firm. Taylor froze narrowing his eyes.

“What?” He hissed.

“I’m not going to suck you off” stiles said a little louder. Taylor was on him in a second.

“Listen to me, you little bitch, I still have that photo and you know what’s going to happen if you don’t use that mouth of yours like you know how to.” His hands were now around stile’s throat making struggle for air, Stiles knew they would bruise.

“No” he whizzed “this is rape and you know it.”

“And who are you going to tell?” Taylor mocked “your Daddy? I don’t think so, you know what’s going to happen, Daddy can kiss his sheriff title goodbye when everyone sees you in that dress, no one wants someone who raised such a fuck up to protect them.”

Those words almost made him give up.

Almost

With all his might he kneed Taylor making him loose his grip and doubled over covering his family jewels. Stiles didn’t looked back even when he heard Taylor bellowing.

“You are going to regret that, Stilinski!” he kept running and felt like sobbing when a familiar black Camaro was parked in front of the school, he hadn’t brought his jeep knowing he would want to feel Derek close for as long as he could.

Running even faster he reached the passenger’s door and threw it open startling the wolf. He sat himself o the passenger’s seat and closed the door.

Something about him must have alert Derek because suddenly he was growling low and menacing.

“Derek” Stiles whispered and both froze for a moment. Stiles savoring and feeling Derek’s name roll of his tongue feeling his chest tight and Derek letting the boy’s voice wash over him settling his wolf in a way the last two months wasn’t possible.

Then he smelled the distress and heard the erratic pounding of his heart, he was on alert again.

“Stiles, what…” he was cut off by stiles.

“Can we go to the preserve?” His voice was fragile, wavering and just after a moment of hesitation the werewolf nodded. Derek drove to the clearing in the preserve he knew was stiles favorite spot. Once on the edge of the woods they started to walk without speaking or touching. Each one trapped in their own minds.

They reached the clearing and Stiles stopped abruptly. Derek did the same a second later and turned around to look straight at him. Stiles was now playing with the sleeves of his red hoodie feeling stupid looking at the man in front of him. His heart was beating faster and faster. He had a whole speech figured out but in that moment all he could think was how he was in love with Derek and that he was now damaged by Taylor.

How was he going to tell everything to Derek or to the rest of the pack?

Then he felt Derek’s warm hands warming his arms through the fabric of his hoodie. He looked up and was leaved breathless by those hazel-blue-gray-green eyes. He had missed those so much he felt his own eyes well up with tears.

“Are you ready to come home?” Derek’s tone was soft, almost pleading. Stiles looked at him confused. “We’re waiting for you.”

“But you… you kicked me out” Stiles said hurt coating his voice, now Derek was the one confused “you told me I didn’t know how to be pack, and then everyone else started to ignore me” he choked. Derek’s eyebrows were almost touching in the middle, Stiles wanted to smooth the frown with his lips.

“They told me you were the one avoiding them” his voice was now unsure.

“We might have avoided each other in the beginning, but then they just didn’t even look at me” the first tear fell. Stiles saw the exact moment Derek realized something very important.

“Oh, Stiles” the next thing he knew was that he was in Derek arms, his body melted “they were hurt at the beginning but then you kept ignoring them and they thought you also needed time for yourself.” Stiles felt Derek breathe deeply still comforting the boy “Humans in packs feel the bond differently at the beginning. They all go through a phase, if you will, before they accept the bond completely. Humans have more options than wolves when it comes to independence so they must choose without a shadow of a doubt to stay and commit to the pack forever. You had to do it alone and no wolf could come near you, your spark most likely jumpstarted the phase when you spent so much time without contact with the pack. No one could contact you even if we wanted to. Only when you made your decision to become one with the pack, not holding back anything, we would be able to be near you again.”

And then Stiles broke. Scaring the wolf at the despair that was pouring out of his body, the bond taking place making him feel every ounce of pain, sadness, anger, helplessness, something darker and then something lighter, relief, love, happiness, joy and so many more feels he felt overwhelmed clinging to the boy in his arms knowing how much Stiles needed it. How much Stiles needed him.

After almost an hour stiles felt his soul finally getting lighter, cleaner. And then for the first time he felt the bond, almost tangible, connecting him to Derek and almost faintly he felt the rest of the pack, he knew they felt him too. They were waiting for them.

His chest was warm again.

“Derek” the wolf hummed letting him know he was listening. “I’m ready to go home, but I need to go get something first.

* * *

They were now near Derek’s loft where he knew everyone was. His box on his lap, Derek eyeing curiously every once in a while, but stiles was calm, he knew this was right, he was ready.

Once they got to the loft Derek opened the loft, everyone was standing, frozen, waiting until Stiles came from behind Derek giving them a wavering smile, already feeling the tears threatening to spill. He gave the wolf the box almost reverently and Derek knew this meant something.

Scott was the first to give a step forward.

They met in the middle embracing each other. After that he felt himself being passed around from warm arms to warm arms noting that he didn’t need to look to know who was embracing him.

Stiles laughed while he cried saying sorry and hearing it in return.

They were all sitting either on the floor, Erica, Scott, and Isaac or on the rest of the couch. Lydia as always on Jackson’s lap sharing with Allison, Boyd was on the recliner and Derek sat next to Stiles on the middle couch.

“I didn’t know what was happening and obviously you couldn’t tell me after it began but I’m so happy it ended” stiles was saying with a shuddering breath “I was so alone” he swallowed thickly. Isaac whined flushing himself against Stiles’ leg, Derek took his hand.

“It was literally killing us” Scott said “I couldn’t even smell you, of hear your heart, it didn’t matter that you where in the same room as me, it was awful.”

“And when we even thought about approaching you it was like our bodies froze, letting you get away” Allison continued shuddering, Stiles did the same, thinking that they wouldn’t have been able to help him if they ever saw Taylor taking him.

“The last full moon sucked” Jackson huffed not looking at anyone, Stiles smiled because he had missed Jackson too.

“No full moon cookies” Erica pouted, Stiles chuckled. Then his smiled dropped and everyone seemed to notice that Stiles was going to say something important.

“I…” he swallowed thickly “I finally could reach you because I finally realized how much I need you in my life, how sad, and void, and helpless I am without you. I finally understood what is to be pack” he smiled at Derek “it’s not that I was weak without you but that I was stronger with you by my side, that night I wanted to protect you but I also wanted to prove to you that I was strong enough to run with you.” He straightened himself “Derek told me the phase wouldn’t end until I was ready to commit completely, not holding back anything. I’m ready to tell my dad about the supernatural if you agree.” Derek gave him a reassuring smile, the rest of the pack smiled and nodded. Stiles felt a weight lift off his shoulders, he cleared his throat. “The… there’s also a part of me I’ve been holding back from you all, even you Scotty” everyone was now looking at him with confused expression.

He breathed deep.

“It all started when my mom got sick and couldn’t de he makeup anymore…” so he began talking, feeling the tight grip on his chest loosening more and more. He told them everything from his mom’s sickness to him doing her makeup and picking her dresses, how after she died he kept her makeup and some of her dresses. He started to pull everything out of the box like pulling out pieces of his own soul for them to see. Everyone was now around him and they looked at everything with a reverence that made him pause for a moment, letting them touch everything, featherlike touches leaving a trail of “Pack” behind.

After a moment of hesitation he told them about Byron and his mom’s birthday when he was thirteen. He took out his wig. Every eye was on him but he didn’t looked at anyone, instead he told them how his mind calmed without medication when he felt like himself, how his limbs didn’t flail as much or how his skin it’s not so tight. How he likes what he sees in the mirror, how he can see himself.

How much he looks so much like his mom.

They sat in silence for a couple of minutes, Stiles’ heart beating nervously before hearing Derek voice.

“Show us” his head snaps up fast looking the encouraging smiles everyone was wearing, swallowing thickly. Then Lydia offers him a white dress with teal polka dots, he still was his wig on his hands.

“We want to see the real stiles” Scott’s puppy dog’s eyes are on. “It’s fair, I’ve known you forever and I still don’t know him.”

“Oh…OK” he doesn’t move for another minute breathing deeply and drawing courage from his pack. Then he goes to Derek’s room, not thinking about how all his stuff, his real stuff, is in Derek’s room like they belonged there. Fifteen minutes later her ready, grimacing at the bruise hiding behind the white lace choker remembering there’s something else he needs to confess.

Taking some calming breaths he goes downstairs and reveals himself.

His eyes find Derek’s automatically, they’re red.

He’s walking without meaning to until he’s in front of the older man and everyone else seems frozen waiting for something. Derek cups his jaw and his eyes start to drop making him look directly into the wolf’s eyes.

“You are beautiful” Stile’s heart skips a beat before he feels himself smiling. The rest of the pack takes that as their cue and everyone is on him in a second.

“Wow” is all Scott says but the crooked smile says much more.

“I love the dress” – Allison smiles.

“I love the makeup” Erica saying eyeing him with a glint in her eyes that makes Stiles wary for a second.

“I even like you more as a girl” – and coming from Jackson it was practically an “I love you”

Boyd nods in appreciation and Isaac blushes.

Lydia is eyeing him and sighs.

“There’s more” Stiles heart skips a beat, it shouldn’t surprise him, really. Lydia knows it all.

“There are two more things.” He again has all their attention. “One thing is good, I hope is good anyways.” he dropped his eyes “you know now how I have this tradition to go eat ice cream and go dancing on my mom’s birthday, like myself” he gestures at himself “today is my mom’s birthday and I would like to…” he breathes in and breathes out, he feels Derek’s hand on his intertwining their finger “would you like to come with me?” he held his breath waiting for an answer.

“If I get to wear a cut dress I’m in.” the first one is Erica.

“You’re going to make Lydia make me dance” Jackson groans and Lydia nods smiling.

“Let’s see if that way you can get yourself a girlfriend, although God knows you won’t find someone as awesome as me” Lydia winked.

“I can always learn how to dance” comes Isaac’s shy response.

“I’ll teach you” Allison said.

“Oh, man, I’m the only one without a partner” was all Scott could say.

“I know someone” Stiles smiled thinking about a cute Asian with marvel leggings.

“Seriously?” He could almost see Scott wagging his tail.

“Yep” then stiles felt Derek tugging his hand.

“That means you’re stuck with me” Derek smiled.

“Can you dance?” – Stiles raised an eyebrow.

“A little” Derek’s smile widen

“Then it’s a date” he felt himself blushing, he had no filter as a boy or as a girl.

“No” Derek said making stiles feel his stomach drop “on our first date we’re not going to bring the pups with us.”

“Ok” he said breathlessly.

“Now, what’s the bad thing” and just like that Stiles’ smile dropped.

“You all have to promise me you are going to let me finish and to not go on a killing spree” everyone tensed at that.

“That just lets us know that we are going to go on a killing spree” Isaac said frowning.

“No, you are not because if you all promise to me you are going to have to keep that promise” Stiles swallowed.

“I don’t like this” Scott said “anyone else has a very bad feeling?” Everyone nodded; stiles felt the burning of Derek’s stare.

“Please?” Slowly, hesitantly, everyone promised it, Derek the most reluctant.

He started with how the last full moon he felt like he couldn’t breathe how he was so sad he needed to go out and be himself for a while, being able to smile for the first time since the fight. There were distressed noises when he talked about his panic attack and Byron having to carry him to the car. The he started shaking describing the feeling he got the next day how he kept expecting something to happen, and how at the end it did. Everyone tensed, waiting. He placed his free hand on his throat touching the lace lightly, chocking when he told them everything Taylor told him while he was pinned against the wall, how he was called a bitch and a freak to then being threaten to not say anything to anyone because he had a picture of him without his wig from the night before.

Derek was holding his hand tightly shaking slightly, Isaac an Jackson were pacing, Lydia had a hand on his knee and Allison was running his thumb and forefinger together surely wishing for her bow at that moment. Erica was on the floor hiding her face hugging his calves.

Every wolf was growling.

To Stiles’ surprise it was Scott who noticed first.

“That’s not all” Scott whispered “something else happened.” Wide terrified eyes, like he knew what it was but the thought was too horrible to fathom. Everyone else had the same look on their eyes. Stiles made himself take a deep breath, he had to get it all out.

“He wanted to see if I could suck a cock like the bitch I was trying to be” it was dead silence for what it seemed like forever before a roar so powerful shook the walls making the glass of the windows almost shatter. No one took notice of Derek though, or his mighty roar because Isaac sliced the steel from the door like it was butter with his claws. Jackson had punched a hole through the wall. Boyd seemed about to snap, eyes glowing and chest vibrating from growling. Scott was shifting before his eyes. Erica was sobbing angry tears wile yelling profanities claws out looking for something to tear apart.  Allison and Lydia were shocked to silence, faces paling with anger and disgust.

Derek was letting go of his hand when stiles reacted violently clinging to him almost sitting on his lap shaking.

“Don’t let go” his voice shook “you promised to hear it all” he almost sobs, he had to tell them everything or he wouldn’t do it later.

“There’s more?” Allison’s vice was shrill. Derek tried to calm himself speaking softly, soothingly.

“Stiles, baby” the pet name seemed to freeze stiles getting his attention “I’m… upset right now” the human almost snorted “I could hurt you” the wolf whispered. Breathing easier Stiles shook his head.

“You won’t hurt me, I need you, please, don’t let go” a moment later he found himself completely on Derek’s lap surrounded by him.

“Ok, sweetheart, I’m here. Go on” Stiles closed his eyes an opened his mouth again.

“It… it kept happening; he would look for me when none of you were near, when I was alone. I stopped eating because I would just throw up and I didn’t want to sleep because of the nightmares. Every day, at least once a day he would just grab me and made me do the same thing again and again” more growls, another hole on the wall “then you disappeared, I knew something had happened, I wanted to know if you were okay but then Taylor notice none of you were coming to school, he…” he sobbed “he took every opportunities, every free period, more than once and even during lunch. I couldn’t take it and shut myself so I didn’t felt anything anymore.

He started shaking again.

“Then I panicked because I literally couldn’t feel anything, like I was dead. So I made myself feel again.” Everyone was frozen again, horrifying realization downing on them.

“Stiles?” Derek stuttered pleading to deny everything, to stop the pain that was chocking him alongside the guilt. Stiles took the werewolf’s hand on his own feeling the hot palm on his skin from his knee to his thigh as he moved up the skirt of his dress. With Derek’s fingers he touched the five closed scabbed wounds. Derek whined, a sound more animal than human, filled with pain that was echoed by every wolf.

Allison and Lydia let the tears fall.

“Fuck the promise, I won’t kill him,” – Jackson growled “I’ll just cut off his dick and make him swallow it whole.”

Everyone seemed on board with that plan.

“No!” he shouted when Jackson was already yanking the door open.

“Why the fuck no?!” Jackson shouted back “the fucker deserves to die.”

“Because I won’t let you kill someone in my name when I’ve already have proof to send him to prison.” Everyone looked at him narrowing their eyes. “I recorded him today trying to do it again, he left evidence by himself” with that he took of the choker and Derek was growling and whining while burying himself on stiles’ neck.

“Fucker doesn’t know who he messed with.” Jackson said with dark eyes, his dad would have a new case tomorrow morning on his desk, if he couldn’t kill the bastard his father was ruthless enough to gain the worst sentence he could.

“Stiles, if we promise to not seriously harm him, would you wait a day before going to your dad?” Something in Lydia’s eyes made him shiver. For some reason he found himself nodding “Great” the smile was even more frightening – “Today’s you moms birthday, your tradition is to live and not to cry, we all shed our tears, now we are all going to get ready and the we’ll eat ice cream and we we’ll dance all night, tomorrow we’ll deal with whatever we need to deal with. Derek will take care of you while I get the rest of us ready.

And with that he was alone still on Derek’s lap neither of them saying anything.

“I hate this promise so much.” – Derek whispered. Hot breath warming stiles’ neck making his toes curl.

“I know” Stiles whispered back. Lips on the werewolf’s temple, nose buried on the inky black hair.

“I didn’t protect you, we weren’t there. How can you forgive us?” Derek asked shakily.

“You know you couldn’t have done anything, it’s not your fault.” He answered “if I hadn’t been so afraid of people seeing my real self I wouldn’t have…” Derek cut him off.

“If it’s not our fault then it sure as hell isn’t yours, he took advantage of you and that’s on him” he nuzzled his temple.  “You are not a freak, you are so beautiful.”

“You know when we were in the preserve I looked at you and for a moment all I could think was that I always wanted to do so many things with you,” stiles whispered not looking at Derek, feeling his cheeks get hot “I dreamed so much and Taylor tainted all those fantasies, he tainted me and I couldn’t see how would you want me after everything.” The hand up his dress kept tracing the lines on his thigh while the other cupped his jaw lifting his face to make him look at the multicolored eyes.

“I’m sure I’ve fantasized as much as you, and every one of those fantasies changed looking at you right here, because you were beautiful before, now you are breathtaking.” Derek’s voice lowered even more, almost to a whisper “You are not damaged. You’re still Stiles, your soul is still as pure as before and everything that happened to you will be a dark dream someday because we’ll be there to help you get through it and to keep anything like that to happen again. You’re finally stuck with us.” Slowly but surely a smile bloomed on Stiles’ face.

“I really want to kiss you” stiles whispered as softly as Derek. The wolf’s hand cupping his jaw moved to his neck covering the bruise there, like he could heal it. The hand touching his thigh stilled and then his lips were barely touching Stiles’.

Stiles erased the distance between them and their lips were touching, sweetly and slowly, a sensual dance of just lips, stiles’ cherry lip gloss being shared between the two. Derek moved his hand up gripping Stiles’ hip firmly pressing them even more together. The younger boy moved now straddling the wolf’s hips cupping his face with both hands deepening the kiss with a shy touch of his tongue. Derek’s chest vibrated with a deep growl making stiles shiver with a tingling sensation from the root of his hair to the tip of his toes.

When they finally needed to breathe they did it into each other’s mouths not wanting to break apart, Derek’s arms circled stiles’ waist keeping him close, their foreheads touching, hearts beating in sync.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so so so sorry! I hope there's still people waiting to read this, it has been an absurd amount of time sine I posted the first chapter but here is the second one at last! I'm not going to make exuses but just know I really wanted to post sooner.
> 
> -No beta so any errors are mine-

They got into the car and Stiles couldn't wipe the huge smile that was on his face, he still could not believe he had just eaten ice-cream in a dress with his best friends. 

They all had entered the loft just an hour after leaving Derek and Stiles alone looking like modernized versions of Grease, you noticed it was the theme but it was up to the standards of Lydia Martin. 

The boys looked on point and the girls as beautiful as always but the one who took the cake was Derek.

Dear God, Stiles felt himself blush remembering the first time he saw Derek walking down the stairs wearing suspenders. Suspenders! 

Stiles had a meltdown, his brain short circuited and he's man enough to admit it. And judging by the smirk Derek threw his way, he wasn't hiding it very well.

They were all now in the cars on their way to the club, Allison, Isaac, Boyd and Erica in Allison's car, Lydia and Jackson in his, and Derek and Stiles had Scott with them. 

"Tell me about her" Scott was asking, again, about Kira. He had been wagging his tail since she had texted Stiles confirming she would meet them there.

"I swear to God, Scott if you keep asking I'm going to make you walk to the club" Derek growled while Stiles snickered, still amazed he could be so happy after everything he went through, he knew he would have to face it, but not that night.

"I just wanna know what's she like" Scott literally pouted.

"Well, we're here so why don't you find out for yourself" Stiles said smiling, Scott bolted out the door. "I swear he's an overgrown puppy" he said fondly. Derek squeezed his hand before kissing his knuckles, Stiles looked at him, watching the worry in the older man's eyes.

"Are you alright?" Derek asked and Stiles felt just a little warmer inside.

"I'm here with you," Stiles took Derek's face with his free hand "with all of you. I know I'm going to have to face everything that happened to me but right now I know I'm safe." Derek was staring at him with such intensity Stiles didn't know what to make of it before leaning in and placing a soft kiss in Stiles' lips, making the teenager sigh.

"Let's go dance" Stiles could just nod.

Once inside the club they found the others already seated in a table barely big enough for all of them. Stiles noticed Jackson's bitch face was ON.

"What's with the face my scaly friend?" Stiles asked once he was closed enough. Lydia was the one that answered.

"He's being a spoilsport" she said like talking to an infant, Stiles didn't know Jackson could rival Derek's scowl until then.

"I just don't see why do I have to dance" he groaned.

"Because," Lydia said rolling her eyes "you're the only one here that can keep up with me" she raised an eyebrow at him "and you know that, you're only afraid people will know you took dance classes when we were little."

"Lydia!" Jackson snapped, Lydia smirked, and so did everyone noticing the blush going up Jackson's cheeks. 

Just as Stiles was going to say something he saw Scott's eyes shining red and his nostrils flaring. Everyone else in the table noticed too and took a defensive stand. 

Stiles tried to subtly look everywhere to see where the threat was. His eyes landed on Kira that was coming closer with a shy smile, cute red dress and Batman leggings. 

"Kira!" Stiles smiled about to go hug her when Derek's arm tighten around his waist. "Derek, what-"

"Kitsune" Derek sounded tense, cautious but not threatening.

"Hey, Stiles" Kira said blushing while side-eyeing Scott that was shamelessly staring at her.

Stiles cleared his throat, he could tell Kira was uncomfortable, everyone was looking at her, and not in a friendly way.

The Stiles saw Kira twitch her nose before her eyes going wide and taking a step back.

"Werewolves" she whispered. "I'm so sorry, I- I didnt know" she took another step back.

"Hey, hey" Stiles took a step forward, he took it as a good sign that Derek let him.

Kira wasn't looking at him, she was looking at Derek.

"Kitsune" Derek said again, this time towards Kira. Stiles saw her swallow.

"Alpha" She said bowing her head, showing respect, but not showing her throat.

After what seemed like an eternity Derek seemed to send some kind of signal stiles didn't catch because everyone relaxed at the same time. Including Kira that sent a shy smiled towards Stiles.

"Ok, so..." Stiles cleared his throat "What just happened?"

"She's a Kitsune" Derek answered, seeing stiles still confused he smiled "a fox spirit, I'm sure you'll research the hell out of it later." Stiles didn't even blush knowing it was true "She's a foreigner in Hale territory, interacting with a pack member without the knowledge of the alpha."

"So you have to know every supernatural creature in your territory?" Stiles asked still confused.

"It would be ideal but not possible, unless is another werewolf pack most supernatural creatures can enter any territory as long as they don't cause trouble, unless they come in direct contact with any member of the pack that owns the territory" Derek continued to explain.

"It's a way for the foreigner to show they don't mean harm to the pack or the territory seeing that if something happen they would be the firsts suspect and the firsts to be cleared in case their not the culprits" Kira smiled at Stiles seen the understanding in his eyes. 

"But I didn't feel like I was part of the pack the last time we saw each-other." Stiles felt Derek close again, apparently he wasn't the only one that didn't like to remember those months.

Kira kept smiling, relaxing even more, like Stiles saying that proved her innocence. And it did, actually. Now she was side-eyeing Scott again. 

Stiles smiled.

"So!" He made everyone jump " not that I don't appreciate the lesson but we are here to dance and have fun, everyone this is Kira, Kira this is everyone" everyone chuckled at stiles. "And this" Stiles put his arm around Scott that had closed his mouth "is my best friend, brother from another mother, Scott." Kira was now blushing prettily "He was looking forward to meet you" now Scott was blushing.

Stiles felt his teeth start to rot; they were too cute to be real, seriously.

Then a little bit shyer he looked at his friends.

"She helped me a lot during these past months" Kira looked at him confused "You don't know how much those little texts with comic facts help me, these weren't the best months for me but those really help brighten up my days"

"I don't know what has happened to you, and it doesn't look like a happy topic, but I have thousands more of those if you ever need one to cheer you up" and that put the last nail on the awkwardness coffin.

Everyone smiled and even Jackson was somewhat nice to Kira and let himself be drag to the dance floor by Lydia, followed by the rest of them. 

Scott apparently snapped out of whatever funk he was in and offered his hand to Kira.

"I must warn you" Kira said smiling at Scott "Foxes and Wolves don't really get along" when Kira took his hand and literal sparks flew. Scot tensed for a second but tightened his hand around Kira's when she was about to take it away.

"Fine by me" and they were off to the dance floor.

"Ugh," Stiles said "I they can't be real, and I though Scott with Allison was bad" 

"I don't know, it looks like half the drama and twice the cuteness, it's manageable" Derek said smirking before wrapping his arms around Stiles' waist.

"If you're paying my dentists visits" Stiles smiled at him.

"I'll even go with you to the appointments" Derek said before kissing the corner of his lips.

"Ugh" Stiles groaned "now you are rotting my teeth, who gave you permission to be sweet, you can't be tall, dark, handsome and sweet. That's overachieving, no one likes overachievers" 

Stile felt Derek's chest moving and he know Derek was laughing, or as much as Derek could laugh anyway.

"Let's go dance" was all he said.

"Wait" Stiles said taking out his phone that had a message from Byron.

'Hey kiddo, how's everything? Are you sure you don't want me there, just tell me and I'll be there in five'

Stiles smiled.

'Everything is perfect'

And everything was because since before his mother died he hadn't been this happy

—

The next day he knew it was time to face the music. The music being his dad.

It was Saturday and his dad was actually free, watching TV, just a few feet away from his son completely unaware of the storm brewing on his sons head.

"Out with it stiles, I can feel your nerves from here and it's getting on my nerves" apparently not completely unaware.

Stiles took a deep breath and sat with his father facing him. The sheriff seemed to see how important this was, because without a second thought he turned off the tv and gave Stiles all his attention.

Stiles felt the love for his dad grow even more. 

"I" he stuttered "I know you know I've been lying to you" he saw his father tense "but before I started lying to you recently I had kept something from you for a long time" Stiles felt his bottom lip tremble "Gosh, I haven't ever started and..." He choked back a sob "Dad, I love you so much, and I hope that after everything I'm about to tell you, you will still love me too" he didn't see his dad moving but a second later he was in his dad's arms surrounded by the familiar scent of ink, gun oil and coffee that took him back to when he was a little kid and needed the monsters to go away and only his dad could protect him, and it didn't matter how late it was or how exhausted his dad felt, he was always there to chase them away.

"Stiles, son, there's nothing you could say to me, absolutely nothing, that could make me not love you" 

And there in the safety only a parent could give Stiles told his dad about the make up and the dresses, the wig and the dancing, of how much he looked like his mom and how much he missed her. 

And his dad never let go of him.

-

After Stiles calmed down he felt like a huge weight had lifted from his shoulder, there was more to talk about but somehow it felt more bearable. 

Both Stilinskis were in the kitchen drinking Tea, a special blend her mother used to drink and the hadn't been even able to smell the spices without wanting to cry their eyes out, now it was soothing to both of them.

"So, you're still a boy or do you identify as a girl?" Trust his dad to worry about that.

"I'm still a boy, dad. I like my sex very much, I just really like to wear makeup, and dresses, and long hair" he finished a little bashfully, still getting used to his father knowing.

They both stayed silent for a few minutes until his dad spoke again.

"You said you had been hiding this from me before the recent lies started, I want to know everything, Stiles. No more lying or going behind my back" Stiles nodded. 

"I know and I promise, dad" he took a deep breath "but Scott and Derek need to be here"

"Derek, as in Derek Hale?" Stiles felt himself blush. "Oh, God! You do know he at least 7 years older than you, don't you?" Stiles nodded, his father sighed rubbing his palms on his face "and it still illegal for him to do anything beyond kissing you." Stiles nodded again, grimacing at the thought of the other conversation they were going to have. "All right, call them."

So, in less than 10 minutes both werewolves were in his doorstep swearing they just "happened" to be close. Stiles loved the two fur balls even more.

And it began a thorough explanation about what had been going on for the last two year, both werewolves shifting when his father looked specially skeptic. Derek clearing any doubts the Sheriff might have. 

At the end of it all everyone was silent, his father knowing there was more and the wolves letting Stiles be the one to start talking.

"Spit it out, Stiles. God knows what else is there to say, and I'm struggling to stay sober right now as it is" 

"Ok, but first you have to promise to not get mad at me or at anyone, we didn't know this would happen" the Sheriff nodded reluctantly. "This last months have been... Hard for me" stiles sighed "I made a mistake a few months ago. As you know I'm the only human in the pack, Allison may be human too but she's a trained hunter capable of going toe to toe with any supernatural being." Stiles knew his father could guess where this was going.

"So you wanted to prove yourself, putting yourself in danger, if I had to guess" his dad was frowning, exasperated but not surprised. 

"I went behind the packs back and I if it wasn't for Derek I don't know what would have happen" Derek took his hand; the gesture wasn't lost to his father. "After that everyone was pretty pissed at me, Derek told me what I did wasn't what being part of a pack was like, I didn't get it at the time. After I began to ignore everyone in the pack something happened, you remember the spark I mentioned earlier? Well it kind of blew things out of proportion in the beginning.”

That was Derek's cue to explain the period humans in packs went through, why they did and how the spark on Stiles made it worst by not letting anyone from the pack getting remotely close to him.

"And to make matters worst someone found out about my secret" now it was turn for Stiles to talk about Taylor, even though he felt bile rose in his throat, he told his father everything there was to tell except...

"I want the names, Stiles" his father looked broken but murderous, clear eyes blazing and hands trembling worryingly. Then he was again in his father's arms, crying again but no with the same forces hi did the last time, with the love from his pack and his dad he felt like he could face anything.

"I can't" Stiles said.

"Why not?" Stiles most chuckled, his dad sounded like a half shifted wolf.

"Because I promised Lydia to give them a day to give him hell." stiles sighed "They know how to not get caught and I don't want you near him outside the law, because as much as I know you're a good man I also know what you are capable of." stiles smiled "I got that from you. I bound the pack to a promise to not kill him but I know I won’t get that from you."

"Damn right, you won’t." the sheriff grumbled "You know me too well kid, you have till Monday after school, I hope they make him pay" Stiles wasn't the one who answered.

"We will" both Derek and Scott said oddly in sync, it made Stiles shuddered.

Then The Sheriff was looking at Derek.

Oh God, Stiles thought.

"I would warn you off, son, but you deserve some happiness and Stiles isn't a kid anymore after all he went through, and he sure as hell deserves all the happiness he can get. My only request is to know you better, because it seems that we'll be seeing a lot from each-other. So you'll come eat with us at least twice a week and every day I have off you'll spend it with us unless I specifically say otherwise. Got it?"

Stiles smiled even more at the dumbfounded expression on Derek's face. Derek really deserved everything good that could happen to him.

"And you'll keep me in the loop about anything and everything supernatural"

Stiles grimaces but he knew there was no way around it.

-  
Monday came and Stiles almost didn't do to school.

Almost, because his plan to skip was ruined by Derek and his stupid Camaro, his stupid leather jacket and his stupid face. 

Stiles hated him.

No, he didn't.

He got in the car and Derek placed a soft kiss in his lips. Stiles sighed.

"I know you would rather stay and avoid everything altogether, and to be honest I would prefer it too" the older man now was running small circles with his thumb on Stiles' wrist. "But this has to end today, and I know you will want to be there when it all goes down" 

"I know, that doesn't make it any easier" Stile frowned.

"We all have your back, that's what packs are for" Derek smiled at him and Stiles retuned the smile even if it was smaller.

-

They didn't have to look too much to figure out what was the cause of all the commotion. On the side wall of the building was the dreaded picture, just a thousand times bigger, his face clearer, there was not mistaking him so the big letter spelling STILINSKI were a bit of overkill.

"If it wasn't being used to hurt you I would say that the picture is really beautiful" Derek said taking Stiles out of his thoughts.

"I thought the same thing, actually, the first time I saw it." Stiles tried, and failed, to smile.

"The pack's got your back, remember?" Derek pointed with his. chin toward the picture, Stiles turned around and this time he really smiled. Scott and Isaac were carrying one of the longest ladders he had ever seen, with identical determined faces.

Stiles thought they were adorable.

Once besides the big picture Stiles noticed Lydia and Allison, both with more pictures of him, smaller of course, in their hands. Lydia was talking down to a girl that seemed in the verge of tears before grabbing the cell phone the girl had in her hand and smashing it against the floor, then she flipped her hair and turned around.

Sweet Allison glared a group of boys to submission; it was kind of funny to watch.

Isaac finally took the picture down and rolled it with a triumphant smirk. 

Jackson appeared out of nowhere looking meaner than Stiles had ever seen him. That was saying a lot coming from stiles. 

Stiles saw Lydia link their arms looking like the power couple they weren't anymore.

"If anyone has a problem with Stilinski you can keep it to yourselves, if I hear someone even looked at him the wrong way you won’t like the consequences." By the time Stiles reached them he was kind of tearing up. He turned around and looked at Derek who still was inside the car and smiled at him before turning to Scott that was now beside him.

"Let's go to class" he said and everyone followed. 

The rest of the day wasn't as bad as he thought it would be. He always was with someone from the pack. Wherever he went there was always someone besides him. 

There were still whispers, disgusted glares, side-eye glances and even some smiles, everything was bearable until the last period. 

He was alone, everyone else going to their classes and his stupid bladder warned him that if he didn’t go to the bathroom soon there was gonna be an accident the janitor would not appreciate.

On his way back he knew before someone grabbed him that something was wrong. The door of the empty classroom slamming shut just added to the sense of dread filling his gut.

He was slammed against a wall and got the wind knocked out of him before turning around facing a pissed of Taylor, or at least he thought it was Taylor.

His head was hairless, no brows either, and all the skin on display was red and irritated, gross pustules filled with puss and scratch marks everywhere, the blood on the tip of his finger suggested it was self inflicted.

"You are going to pay, freak" Taylor hisses before knocking Stiles with a punch to the jaw. Stiles almost passed out from the pain. "Where are your friends now, huh?" 

He kicked his chest.

"Who's gonna save you?" Stiles waited for the pain but he just heard a choked noise and a snarl he knew too well.

"Derek" he whispered and Derek was at his side in an instant letting go of Taylor's throat.

"I'm here" he was pulled to an embrace and felt the wolf taking his pain.

"And where do you think you are going?" He heard Lydia's cold voice and then noticed the rest of the pack was there. Alison now had a ring dagger pressed against Taylor’s neck while Boyd had his arms locked with his own massive ones. The rest of the wolves looked ready to shift. 

"Lydia, you know what to do" the alpha said and a cold smile transformed the redhead's face before taking something from her purse and pressing it against Taylor’s nose, who was still struggling to get free, and rendering him unconscious. 

A minute later the pack vanished after making sure stiles was okay.

Only Scott and Erica were left behind. 

"Hey Batman" Erica said sitting besides him on the floor. 

"Hey, Catwoman" he tried to smile.

"You're safe, Stiles" Scott had his angry puppy eyes on, half concerned half pissed.

"What are the other's doing?" He asked feeling like he wasn't inside his own body. He didn't notice he was shaking until Scott took his hand. 

It was Derek who answered.

"Jackson is on his way home with Isaac to talk to his father, Boyd felt bad after lunch and was sent home by the nurse and Allison is with Lydia, her father came for them early because there was a family emergency and she needed her best friend, Chris can attest to that, Erica found you here and called Scott who called me so I could come an get you and go to the police." Stiles notice he has giving him the official story, the one they were going to use to get out of anything they were planning on doing.

He just nodded and let himself being carried to the parking lot where the put him on the back seat with Erica that was now taking his pain, making him drowsy. 

Next thing he knows he is on the station and his dad is waiting for him with worry all over his face. They took him inside and he felt the eyes of the other deputies who were frozen in place for a moment looking at him.

"Who the fuck did that to you?" he tried to smile; he had never heard sweet Tara swear.

"Tara you are going to have to take his statement, you know I can't do it." the sheriff sounded like the words where being dragged out of his throat. 

Tara nodded and took Stiles' hand.

"Come on, sweetie" she said in the same tone of voice she used to explain his math homework to him, sweet and patience. "Anderson!" She shouted and a man on his late forties with salt and pepper hair and brown eyes followed them to the interrogation room. 

Stiles looked back at his dad, Derek and Erica and felt the strength he needed to do what he needed to do. 

And hour later everyone at the station knew what had happened to Stiles and everyone was pissed. Every single deputy that had ever babysat Stiles, everyone that had ever given him candy or was charmed by his motor mouth was out for blood, there was a man hunt with the name Taylor Carmichael on it. 

Tara cried with him and hugged him after he told everything and then smiled at him telling him about the time he was nine and saw her putting lipstick on, he had took his blue lollipop and imitated her ending up with half his face tainted blue.

He didn't remember it but it sounded a lot like him.

Anderson was cleaning his gun with a frown on his face. He had babysat Stiles and Stiles babysat his daughter, Emily, which next year would turn ten years old. 

Even the new Deputy seemed angry, well, any decent human being would be disgusted by what Taylor had done so Stile took it as a good sign. He even offered Stiles water with a sweet smile.

In that moment Lydia and Allison rushed into the station.

"Oh my God, Stiles!" He felt both girls hugging him. "Erica called us, what happened?" For a moment Stiles was dumbfounded, give the girls an Oscar, he knew the concern was real but they honestly looked like they didn't know what was happening.

Still a little high from the werewolf mojo Stile let Erica recite the official story, Taylor had assaulted him when he found out Stiles was going to go to the police to press charges against him but when Stiles didn't back up he had ran away leaving Stiles to be found by Erica, who called Scott, who called Derek.

"Let's hope they find him soon so he can get what he deserves" Lydia said with a secret smile that told him half the punishment was already delivered.

"We will find him" the new deputy obliviously reassured her. Lydia took notice of him and Oh Wow, she looked star struck, or as much as she could anyway, before smiling innocently.

"I'm sure you will. You're new around here." she said turning towards him, her flirty tone unmistakable. The Deputy blushed and that seemed to make Lydia smile widen.

"Transferred a couple of weeks ago" he answered politely.

"Lydia, leave Parrish alone" Stiles said smiling, Lydia pouted, he rolled her eyes. "I'm up for pack night, I need some serious cuddles." her face softened and nodded.

"That can be arranged" then she turned facing Parrish again. "I'm sure we will be informed if anything happens" she smiled before taking Allison's and Erica's hands and starting to walk towards the exit with Derek and Stiles behind them. 

Stiles hugged his dad tightly murmuring that he was fine and that they would be at Derek's. The Sheriff promised he would pass by later

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed the first hapter, tell me what you think? leave ideas for the pack against Taylor! justie wil be served I promise!


End file.
